SantaBanta Universal Jokes

SantaBanta Universal Jokes


SantaBanta Universal Humour for March 29, 2014

Posted: 28 Mar 2014 11:30 AM PDT

A True Love Story!

This 89 year old woman was arrested for lifting.

When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?"

She replied, "Can of peaches."

The judge asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches and she replied that she was hungry. Then the judge asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied 6.

The judge said, "Then I will give you 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband spoke up and asked, the judge if he could say something on his wife's behalf. The judge said, "What is it?"

The husband said, "She also stole a can of peas."

फ़ालतू की बकवास!

एक सिनेमा घर में कोई किशोर किशोरी लगभग आधा समय आपस में ही बातें करते रहे।

उनके पास बैठे दर्शकों को यह बहुत बुरा लग रहा था। जब एक दर्शक से रहा ना गया तो बोल उठा, "क्या तोते की तरह टांय-टांय लगा रखी है, कभी चुप ही नहीं होते।"

इस पर किशोर ने बिगड़कर कहा, "क्या आप हमारे बारे में कह रहे हैं?"

उत्तर मिला: जी नहीं, फ़िल्म वालों को कह रहा हूँ। शुरू से ही बकवास करे जा रहे हैं। आपकी बातों का एक भी शब्द सुनने नहीं दिया।'

Picture SMS

The more pity, that fools may not speak wisely what wise men do foolishly.

The more pity, that fools may not speak wisely what wise men do foolishly.

So, rather than appear foolish afterward, I renounce seeming clever now.

So, rather than appear foolish afterward, I renounce seeming clever now.

Silence is foolish if we are wise, but wise if we are foolish.

Silence is foolish if we are wise, but wise if we are foolish.

Clean SMS

If people say you are crazy, be patient;
If they say you are a moron, relax;
If they say you are stupid, be cool;
But if they say you are smart, then slap these stupid people.
Happy All Fools' Day!

Sacche Doston ki 3 Nishaniyan:
1) Kamine Kabhi call nahi karenge.
2) Zalim has-has ke message padhenge.
3) Chahe jitni beizzati karlo, Besharam Message pura padhenge!

May God gives you strength and capabilities to deposit your taxes well in time.
Happy 31st March!

Hindi SMS

संता काफी देर से अपने मैरिज सर्टिफिकेट को घूर कर देख रहा था।
उसकी पत्नी जीतो बोली: इतनी देर से इसे क्यों घूर रहे हो?
संता: इसकी एक्सपायरी डेट ढूंढ रहा हूं।

यदि आप पहली अप्रेल को मूर्ख बने तो एक ही दिन के लिए मूर्ख बनोगे।
परन्तु यदि आप चुनाव वाले दिन को मूर्ख बने तो अगले पांच साल मूर्ख बने रहोगे।
अपना कीमती वोट दे कर समझदार बनें।
शुभ अप्रेल फूल।

पत्नी: अगर मैं मर गई तो कितने दिनों के बाद दोबारा शादी करोगे?
पति: महंगाई का ज़माना है इसलिए कोशिश यही करूँगा कि चौथे के साथ-साथ ही शादी की रिसेप्शन एडजस्ट हो जाए!

Quotes

The more pity, that fools may not speak wisely what wise men do foolishly.

Take all the fools out of this world and there wouldn't be any fun living in it, or profit.

So, rather than appear foolish afterward, I renounce seeming clever now.

0 comments:

Contact

Talk to us

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit. Dolores iusto fugit esse soluta quae debitis quibusdam harum voluptatem, maxime, aliquam sequi. Tempora ipsum magni unde velit corporis fuga, necessitatibus blanditiis.

Address:

9983 City name, Street name, 232 Apartment C

Work Time:

Monday - Friday from 9am to 5pm

Phone:

595 12 34 567

fb