| SantaBanta Universal Humour for October 29, 2016 Posted: 28 Oct 2016 11:30 AM PDT A man and a woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting unconcerned.
The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.
Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared.
After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table."
The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, "No he didn't. He just walked in the door." | | | |  | | | | A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk.
So the bartender says to another man in the bar, "Why don't you be a good Samaritan and take him home."
The man takes the drunk out the door and to his car and he stumbles at least ten times.
They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car and they stumble up the steps to his house the drunk almost having to be carried.
The drunk's wife greets them at the door, "Why thank you for bringing him home for me, but where's his wheel chair?" | | तीन मरे हुए राजनीतिज्ञों के शव शमशान में उठ खड़े हुए सभी के मुहं में बड़ी मुस्कान थी, पुलिस ने डाक्टर को बुलाया ये देखने के लिए की क्या हो गया है, एक जासूस पुलिस वाले को भी बुलाया गया की देखें क्या हुआ है!
पहले शव को देखकर डाक्टर ने कहा, ये बी.जे.पी का नेता है जो हर्ट अटैक से मरा जब ये अपनी नौकरानी के साथ प्यार कर रहा था इसीलिए बड़ी हंसी हंस रहा है डाक्टर ने कहा!
पुलिस ने दूसरा शव बाहर निकाला तो डाक्टर ने कहा ये सतासीन पार्टी का नेता है, इसकी उम्र 70 साल है सरकारी कोष में घोटाले करके सारा पैसा शराब में उड़ाया लीवर ख़राब होने से मरा फिर भी मुस्करा रहा है ये कुछ खास नहीं है!
पुलिस ने सोचा और तीसरे शव को देखा, डाक्टर ने कहा ये सबसे अनोखा है, बिहार का सांसद, उम्र 60 साल ये आसमानी बिजली के गिरने से मर गया!
पुलिस वाले ने पूछा पर ये हंस क्यों रहा है?
तो डाक्टर ने कहा, ये अभी भी यही सोच रहा है की इसकी फोटो खिंची जा रही है! | | | | | | May millions of lamps illuminate your life with endless joy, peace, health & wealth forever.
Wishing you and your family a very Happy Diwali! | | | | | | | A festival full of sweet childhood memories, sky full of fireworks, mouth full of sweets, a house full of lamps and heart full of joy.
Wish you a very Happy & Prosperous Diwali! | | | | | | | May the joy, cheer, mirth and merriment of this divine festival surround you forever.
May the happiness, that this season brings brighten your life and may the year brings you luck and fulfills all your dearest dreams.
Warm Diwali Greetings! | | | | | May millions of lamps illuminate your life with endless joy, peace, health & wealth forever.
Wishing you and your family a very Happy Diwali! | | | | A festival full of sweet childhood memories, sky full of fireworks, mouth full of sweets, a house full of lamps and heart full of joy.
Wish you a very Happy & Prosperous Diwali! | | | | May the joy, cheer, mirth and merriment of this divine festival surround you forever.
May the happiness, that this season brings brighten your life and may the year brings you luck and fulfills all your dearest dreams.
Warm Diwali Greetings! | | | | दीप जलें तो रौशन आपका जहान हो,
पूरा आपका हर एक अरमान हो,
माँ लक्ष्मी जी की कृपा बनी रहे आप पर हर दम,
ऐसा शुभ दीपावली का आपका त्यौहार हो।
दीपावली की हार्दिक बधाई! | | | | लक्ष्मी जी का आपके सिर हाथ हो,
सरस्वती जी का साथ हो,
गणेश जी का हृदय में निवास हो,
आपके जीवन में खुशियों का प्रकाश ही प्रकाश हो।
दिवाली की शुभ कामनायें! | | | | भगवान करे हर घर में हो उजाला, आये ना कभी कोई रात काली;
हर घर में हों खुशियाँ, हर घर में हो रौशन दिवाली।
सभी को दिवाली की शुभ कामनायें! | | | | Every No brings you closer to a Yes. | | | | Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing at all. | | | |
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