SantaBanta Universal Jokes

SantaBanta Universal Jokes


SantaBanta Universal Humour for February 24, 2017

Posted: 23 Feb 2017 10:30 AM PST

Female Intution

Female Intution

How to Revive Her

Wife was in the ICU.

The husband was unable to control his tears.

Doctor: We are trying our best but can't guarantee anything. Her body is not reacting. It seems she is in a coma.

Husband: Doctor, please save her. She is just 30 years old and the family needs her.

Suddenly something happened. Miraculously the ECG started beeping like crazy.

A hand moved, her lips mumbled and she spoke, "Darling, I'm 29, not 30..."

स्वर्ग और पृथ्वी में फर्क!

एक आदमी ने भगवान की बहुत आराधना की तो भगवान उस से प्रसन्न हो गए और उसके समक्ष प्रकट हुए तो वह आदमी भगवान् से बोला,"क्या मै एक सवाल पूछ सकता हूं?"

भगवान ने कहा, "पूछो"।

आदमी: "हे भगवान... करोड़ो साल मतलब तुम्हारे लिए कितने है?"

भगवान: करोड़ो साल मेरे लिए एक सेकंड के बराबर हैं।

उस आदमी को बहुत आश्चर्य हुआ। फिर उस आदमी ने आगे पूछा, "भगवान, करोड़ो रुपये की तुम्हारे लिए कितनी अहमियत रखते हैं?"

भगवान ने कहा, "करोड़ो रुपये मेरे लिए सिर्फ एक पैसे के बराबर हैं"।

आदमी: हे भगवान, तो क्या तुम मुझे एक पैसा दे सकते हो?

भगवान: जरुर. . .सिर्फ एक सेकंड रुको।

Picture SMS

Om Tryambakam Yajamahe Sugandhim Pushthi Vardhanam,<br/>  Urvarukamiva Bandhanan Mrityormukshi Ya Mamrtaat!<br/>  Wish you all a very happy & auspicious Maha Shivratri!

Om Tryambakam Yajamahe Sugandhim Pushthi Vardhanam,
Urvarukamiva Bandhanan Mrityormukshi Ya Mamrtaat!
Wish you all a very happy & auspicious Maha Shivratri!

On this auspicious occasion may the blessings of Lord Shiva be with all of you.<br/>  May His glorious, divine and merciful attributes remind us of our own abilities and strive to lift ourselves to heights.<br/>  A Happy Maha Shivratri to all!

On this auspicious occasion may the blessings of Lord Shiva be with all of you.
May His glorious, divine and merciful attributes remind us of our own abilities and strive to lift ourselves to heights.
A Happy Maha Shivratri to all!

May Lord Shiva shower his benign blessings on you and your family.<br/>  May happiness and peace surround you with his eternal love and strength.<br/>  Happy Maha Shivratri!

May Lord Shiva shower his benign blessings on you and your family.
May happiness and peace surround you with his eternal love and strength.
Happy Maha Shivratri!

Clean SMS

Om Tryambakam Yajamahe Sugandhim Pushthi Vardhanam,
Urvarukamiva Bandhanan Mrityormukshi Ya Mamrtaat!
Wish you all a very happy & auspicious Maha Shivratri!

On this auspicious occasion may the blessings of Lord Shiva be with all of you.
May His glorious, divine and merciful attributes remind us of our own abilities and strive to lift ourselves to heights.
A Happy Maha Shivratri to all!

May Lord Shiva shower his benign blessings on you and your family.
May happiness and peace surround you with his eternal love and strength.
Happy Maha Shivratri!

Hindi SMS

कण-कण में शिव हैं, हर जगह में शिव हैं;
वर्तमान भी शिव हैं और भविष्य काल भी शिव हैं;
नमो नमो:
आप सभी को महा-शिवरात्रि की हार्दिक शुभ कामनायें!

ना कोई चिंता, ना कोई भय;
जब साथ में हों डमरू वाले, त्रिशूल धारी, त्रिनेत्र, नीलकंठ वाले भोले भंडारी।
महा-शिवरात्रि की शुभ कामनायें!

बम भोले डमरू वाले शिव का प्यारा नाम है;
भक्तो पे जो अपना प्यार दिखाता, ऐसा हरी का प्यारा नाम है;
शिव जी की जिसने दिल से है की पूजा;
शंकर भगवान ने उसका सँवारा काम है।
महा-शिवरात्रि की शुभ कामनायें

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