| SantaBanta Universal Humour for November 3, 2016 Posted: 02 Nov 2016 11:30 AM PDT | |  | | | | | | | | | | A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady 40 miles per hour. The husband is behind the wheel.
His wife suddenly looks across at him and speaks in a clear voice. "I know we have been married for over twenty years, but I want a divorce."
The husband says nothing, he keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases his speed to 45mph.
The wife speaks again, "I don't want you to try to talk me out of it because I've been having an affair with your best friend, and he is a far better lover than you are."
Again the husband stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel more tightly and slowly increases the speed to 55mph.
She pushes her luck, "I want the house."
Up to 60 mph.
"I want the car, too," She continues.
Up to 65mph now.
"And," she says, "I'll have the bank accounts, all the credit cards and the boat!"
The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete bridge.
This makes her nervous, so she asks him, "Isn't their anything you want?"
The husband at last replies in a quiet and controlled voice, "No, I've got everything I need."
"Oh, really," she inquires, "so what have you got?"
Just before they slam into the wall at 65mph, the husband turns to her, smiles, said, "The airbag!" | | | | | | पूजा के दौरान:
माँ: अरे तुम्हें आरती याद है न?
बेटा: हाँ माँ, वो पतली सी, काली आँखों वाली, सुन्दर सी, शर्मा जी की बेटी, वही न?
माँ: कमबख्त, माता की आरती की बात कर रही हूँ। | | | | | | | फ़ास्ट फ़ूड खाने से आदमी फ़ास्ट नहीं हो जाता। स्मार्ट फ़ोन रखने से स्मार्ट नहीं हो जाता।
लेकिन लूज मोशन होने से "लूज" ज़रूर हो जाता है।
दिवाली की बची हुई मिठाई संभाल के खाना रे बाबा। | | | | | | | Chartered Accountant: तमीज से बात कर, हम CA हैं।
Tailor: ऐसा है,तो हम भी बहुत सिये हैं, बचपन से आज तक बस सिये ही सिये हैं। | | | | | A nagging wife and a dripping tap have a lot in common! | | | | Met this nice girl at the mall today.
Her name was No and coincidentally her number was also No! | | | | They say that a marriage makes a man dizzy, and it's true...
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As soon as I got a wife, I lost my balance at the bank! | | | | पूजा के दौरान:
माँ: अरे तुम्हें आरती याद है न?
बेटा: हाँ माँ, वो पतली सी, काली आँखों वाली, सुन्दर सी, शर्मा जी की बेटी, वही न?
माँ: कमबख्त, माता की आरती की बात कर रही हूँ। | | | | फ़ास्ट फ़ूड खाने से आदमी फ़ास्ट नहीं हो जाता। स्मार्ट फ़ोन रखने से स्मार्ट नहीं हो जाता।
लेकिन लूज मोशन होने से "लूज" ज़रूर हो जाता है।
दिवाली की बची हुई मिठाई संभाल के खाना रे बाबा। | | | | Chartered Accountant: तमीज से बात कर, हम CA हैं।
Tailor: ऐसा है,तो हम भी बहुत सिये हैं, बचपन से आज तक बस सिये ही सिये हैं। | | | | Your love was the light that chased away the endless night & led me back into the sun. | | | | I knew you were mine when I met you. My soul recognized its twin in yours. | | | |
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